Mirror, Mirror on the Wall…

…Who’s the Meanest One of All?

I bet that question caught you by surprise. After all, we’re used to looking for our fairest image when we gaze into a mirror. Only when we were children did we, maybe, pose at the mirror, grimacing and making funny, awkward faces. And we did it just for fun.

As adults, I doubt we’d like to see all the ways we contort our faces in less than pretty ways when we get mad; gritting our teeth or talking with our jaws clenched, frowning, scowling, furrowing our eyebrows, speaking sharply or yelling loudly.

angry womanWhen we get angry and lose our temper this is the face our children see — the meanest one of all. Have you ever wondered what that looks like? Sure, it feels awful (maybe even shameful) just thinking about it, but push through to gain some perspective.

I encourage you to take a close look at your anger, literally. Get in front of a mirror and reenact how you engage with your family when you’re mildly frustrated, mad, and then when you’re so steeped in red-hot anger that you’d swear there’s steam coming out your ears.

As you do this, be real; speak the words — or yell, if you yell a lot, gesture and make all the motions. It’s sobering to see your meanest face of all. It’s not easy, but it’s definitely a worthwhile thing to do.  Few women are ready to see that mom in the mirror, but it’ll change for the better the way you face your children, and express your anger, in the future.